Q & A: What is it like to take a semester off college because of depression?

The way I was raised, college was a given. The only person who wasn’t convinced was me. I mean, yeah, it made sense, but I wasn’t sure I really wanted this. But my parents just thought it was Freshman jitters, and off I went. This resulted in my first suicide attempt. I should have put my foot down and stayed home until I was emotionally ready to do this.  Isn’t hindsight wonderful?

That being said, when I did finally take time off, going back was much harder than I thought it would be. My heart just wasn’t in it the second time ‘round, and my grades reflected that. I knew something was really REALLY wrong, but I had no idea what, so I couldn’t communicate it to anyone else in a way that made sense. I didn’t try to kill myself this time, but I didn’t go back after my second year either. Of course, I wasn’t diagnosed at that time, so my family couldn’t figure out if I was just that lazy, or just a loser. I think they settled for “she’s a bit of both”.

Q & A: How can I get my parents to admit me to a mental ward? I’m extremely depressed. My mom knows and I’m on medication, but I don’t think my dad really knows. I’m suicidal, and I’m too scared to tell them that, but I really need help.

The short answer – you don’t. There’s no need to wait for them to do anything. You can do it yourself.

The long answer – I’ve been in a psych ward 5 times. Some were fantastic and incredibly helpful. Some were so bad I told every lie I could think of to get the hell out asap. It’s really a crap shoot. But if you feel in your heart you should be in one, don’t hesitate. Pick up the phone, call 911. Give the operator (who will be nice to you – I promise!) your address. State clearly that you are suicidal and are considering harming yourself. You do NOT need to tell your parents before you do this. You do NOT need to ask anyone’s permission. Just do it.

What happens next is a little dramatic. I can’t say it’s a good time, especially if your folks don’t know about it first. However, this isn’t for them. It’s for YOU. Paramedics will arrive pretty damn fast with lights and sirens and the whole nine yards. They may or may not be accompanied by cops or fire. This is a stupid thing to say, because I know you’ll be jumpy as hell, but try to remain as calm as you can. Deep breath, find your happy spot, remember who’s important here (that would be you). No one will arrest you – you didn’t do anything wrong. The paramedics will come in, find you, and ask to talk to you. If your folks are at home they may pull them aside so that at least one person can talk to you alone (especially if you request it).

If they think you’re a danger to yourself (be sure to keep as calm as you can but continue to assure them you’re suicidal) they’re obligated by law to take you to a safe location, then hold you there for 72 hours to be evaluated. Depending on how nervous they are, they may take you to the hospital in the ambulance or in the back of a squad car – the squad car is usually reserved for people who threaten others, not themselves.

That’ll start the ball rolling. You’ll have an opportunity to talk to mental health professionals who will help to evaluate what’s going on and the best way forward. You might be able to leave after the 72 hour hold expires, or they might decide you need to stay a bit longer.

Remember, you haven’t done anything wrong. You do not need permission to do this. You’re in trouble. Pick up the phone and get the help you need.